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Surviving

This week I spent two days alone with little L for the first time. As ridiculous as it sounds, husband had a seminar right here, in Chicago, but still had to stay in a hotel downtown. Networking, he said. So I was alone with the baby. I’m a scary cat. I don’t like to spend the night alone anywhere. Not to talk about a house in a quiet street in Lincoln Square… I thought I wouldn’t be able to sleep. Well, that was not the case. I have discovered several things:
1. I don’t get scared that easily anymore. I turn off the lights, I would read for a while, and then I would go peacefully to sleep.
2. I sleep better alone. I know it’s not romantic, but I think separated beds are a very civilized way of living. I miss him, but I got much better quality rest.
3. I was able to keep the house clean and tidy. Probably because I didn’t expect anyone to help me. My daily routine was way more organized.
4. L is going to keep throwing tantrums. I have to learn how to cope with them.
I survived. I’m happy. I feel stronger.
I also made a new friend, a mom I meet n swimming class months ago. She is from the Philippines, and has a lovely eighteen month old. The boys had fun, and we were happy to have someone with whom we could have a girly grown up conversation. I need that sometimes. I need a break from intellectually charged conversations.
Loner mom is not so lonely lately. I guess that’s good. Last Saturday I even went out and got pretty drunk. Not something I do often, but I had lost all of my alcohol resistance (remind me to talk about Spanish drinking habits another time). The hangover was horrendous, but I survived it too. And I want to go out again. Soon.

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