English Family Movies

To Mary Poppins, to the Supernanny: I need you!!!

*This post was written during ChicagoNow’s Blogapalooz-Hour for September 2015. During Blogapalooz we are given a prompt and we have one hour to post. This is today’s prompt: “Write a letter to a celebrity (rock star, politician, athlete, movie star, etc.) convincing them you should become best friends”

Dear Mary Poppins and Supernanny:

I should add to that prompt that this will be actually written in 14 minutes. And that is the main reason why I want to be friends with you. Very good friends.

Because I have beautiful, smart, funny, loving kids who can drive anyone crazy. The kind of kids who barely stop moving while asleep. And we need help. For eight years we have tried to do this on our own (kind of, since we have been supported by a myriad of therapists, a nanny and a couple of awesome babysitters), and it’s just not working, as you can see by the fact that I can barely sit for an hour to write.

There have been plenty of nights when I dreamed that you, Mary, flew through my window, hat and umbrella in hand, and made my children gleefully comply with your rules, gave me a spoonful of sugar, and bring harmony into my house. Your cleaning skills wouldn’t hurt, either. And I want that white dress you wore while riding the carousel.

I also fantasize often with Jo Frost, the Supernanny, knocking at my door and giving me back the reigns of my house. Teaching me how to be stern, and serious, and how to gain my kids’ respect. Showing me what exact expression your face has to show for your kids to actually sit through a timeout without putting up a fight that would qualify them for the WWE, or the zoo.

You could be my child care dream team,  your presence would be a dream come true, with your Britishness and your propriety, with your rules and your flying skills. Because being able to fly even for five minutes would rock my world. Because being able to do anything, really anything for five  uninterrupted minutes would change my life forever.

For all that, you need to be my friends. I will brew delicious tea, bake some treats, and lure you into our life.

And you will turn it around. And then you will sing.

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